CHOC Children’s, a non-profit pediatric care system in Orange County, was offered the opportunity to place an ad in the Orange County Business Journal. I was tasked with writing the accompanying article.

The Project

At first, the ad was set to highlight KidsArt, one of CHOC’s programs that raises money through art created by patients. The branding team suggested focusing on Crosby, a KidsArt participant whose family fundraises in honor of his healing journey. The team gave me a short blurb about Crosby and asked me to expand his story to get closer to the suggested 1,000 word minimum.

I began to draft the piece, initially dedicating a large portion to soliciting donations and information about CHOC’s fundraising. Because I knew very little about Crosby and his family, I did my own research about their story through their fundraising websites and materials.

As I began to edit, I realized that that the true appeal of the piece was not fundraising – it was Crosby himself. His participation in KidsArt was merely a small part of the bigger message: that philanthropy from the community was and continues to be essential to his healing.

The story began to shift toward the patient, making the solicitation that was left meaningful and relevant.

The branding team and I also decided to write under the suggested word count and worked with the OCBJ to produce a draft at the final length. We wanted to cut out fluff from Crosby’s story, keeping it true to him and his family. We also wanted to maintain best practices in writing for advertisements: shorter is, in general, better, because it streamlines communication with the reader.

The Results

Printed in the OCBJ’s October 21, 2019 issue. Click the photo below to read the article.